Waterworks

Okay, I'm ready for fkaBaxter. I knew he'd eventually arrive; I mean, our second bedroom suddenly accumulated half a dozen giraffes of different sizes, boxes arrived to the office almost every day, and Baleen kept getting bigger, but it felt so far away, especially after morning sickness and nausea and long commutes and the priority of healthy meals after those long commutes meant all my attention was directed sideways, toward Baleen.

Then the eighth month came around Baleen stopped making that long commute and really preparing for fkaBaxter while I had to prepare for the SATs again. Not the actual SATs, but some age equivalent test, a seven hour test graded on a computer with a Pass/Fail for all your bosses to see. So while Baleen was putting the final touches on the nursery and Googling healthy casseroles to freeze, I was slogging through a four hundred page study manual. But I'm done and my attention isn't pointed sideways, but a little lower. I'm crouched down there like Gary Carter ready to catch little fkaBaxter.

There's a $5 bet going on around here about whether I'm going to cry in that hospital. Baleen never carries cash, but she's promised to empty her purse of a few pounds and twenty quarters if she's wrong. As exhibits A, B, and C, she cites any viewings of The Voice, when I might get a little teary eyed at people realizing their dreams on a big stage or even acting admirably when they're crushed; for me, I cite August 14th, 2010, when I stood up in front of our friends and family and spoke clearly enough for everybody to hear, downwind as they were. Either way, it's the best $5 we'll ever spend.